BPDRecovery.com: Forums

looking for additional information. breakups have been unusually difficult for me to accept. fiancee split, but i truly believe she is also narcissistic personality disorder as BCSW, MSW family member observed her behavior and personality. nevertheless, i am confident that i exhibit many symptoms of bpd. fortunately, no self-mutiliation or real suicidal tendencies. i am a male and i understand that males are typically more agressive toward others (i exhibited verbal agression, no physical agression) than females whereas females tend to be more self-mutilating?

Hi atl and welcome to the board.

First off, we can't tell you if you have BPD or not, as we are not mental health professionals. It would be unethical -- not to mention illegal -- if we were to try. If you feel you might have BPD, the best thing for you to do is to see a qualified psychiatrist and discuss your problems with him/her.

That said, I don't think it's a secret that more women are diagnosed with BPD than men. Perhaps it has something to do with boys generally being socialized in childhood to be more aggressive, and less likely to engage in inward-directed, self-destructive behaviors. But there are eight other diagnostic criteria, so it can't just be that. There are a lot of women here who do not self-injure, and many who also are or have been quite aggressive when in a rage. I know I've read that men are more likely to be diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder than BPD, and many people believe they really have BPD. So I don't know -- again, the best way to determine what is causing your problems is to seek diagnosis and treatment with qualified professionals.

In the meantime, have a read around the site. Click on bpdrecovery at the very top left of the page to see more information on the main site, and for sure check out the various forums here. If you have questions, don't be shy and ask away.

Welcome atl.