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Welcome to BPDR!

BPDRecovery is a site that focuses on recovering from Borderline Personality Disorder using tools that are predominantly Cognitive Based Therapy (CBT) oriented. We are a non-discriminatory website which means that all individuals are welcome - whether you've been formally diagnosed or simply recognize yourself or someone you know in the diagnostic criteria, you are welcome here!

For the sake of clarity, we define "recovery" as "healthy, happy living." The tips, techniques and tools offered in this site are intended for everyone - BPD or NON - and may be able to help you achieve healthy, happy living.

This site was founded in 2001 by a recovered Borderline - Ash - as a result of the ever-increasing need to get the word out that recovery from BPD is possible. It's not easy and it doesn't happen overnight but it is possible!

The site has a capable group of volunteers who are committed to furthering the tenets of BPDRecovery.com. You will see some of these people with Community Leader or Senior Community Leader titles on the forums.  These folks are not hall monitors or rule-enforcers.  They are part of the peer support group just like everyone else and they are dedicated to maintaining a community where people are able to work on overcoming their borderline behaviour rather than practicing it.

Because of the unique nature of, individual approach to, and timetable for, the path of recovery for each individual will be vastly different though strikingly similar. We fully recognize that not everyone will be at the same place at the same time. BPDR is intended for the following people:

  • newbies who need a settling-in period to get acclimated to the Tools
  • those who've embraced the Tools but would like / benefit from peer support in working with them
  • those who've achieved some level of mastery of the Tools into their daily lives and are willing to offer peer support to others in earlier stages of the recovery journey.
BPDR is not for everyone at every time in every situation. No website or online community can reasonably expect to or promise to deliver such a thing.

This is a safe arena for those with mental illnesses and disorders (specifically BPD) to share concerns, voice opinions, seek like-minded individuals working toward recovery, discuss medications and therapy approaches, and explore the impact of their illness(es) have had on their life and the lives of their loved ones. As mentioned, you need not have a formal diagnosis to participate or benefit from the resources offered here. All are welcome.

If you do not believe you have BPD but are concerned about someone you know who does or may have BPD, you are welcome at BPDR so long as the focus is on yourself.  The community will not provide answers about where, how, why someone with BPD does something or acts in a particular way.  We will, however, offer tips and suggestions (usually based on the BPDR Tools) for ways to handle those BPD-types of situations and how to effectively communicate and enforce boundaries.

Regardless of the type of therapy you've chosen or may be considering choosing - psychoanalysis, EMDR, DBT, CBT or something else entirely - this site is here to help you deal with Borderline Personality Disorder issues. As a peer-support group, we offer support, discussion, tips, advice and encouragement.

BPDR is very focused on a Cognitive Based Therapy (CBT) approach and we believe, very fundamentally, in the Existential Paradox from Dr. Joseph Santoro:

We are not responsible for how we came to be who we are as adults.
But as adults we are responsible for whom we have become and for everything we say and do.
In order for BPDR - its tools and peer support group, with a recovery focus - to be effective and helpful for you, it's best that you're in a place within your personal journey of recovery where you are ready to confront your old ways of thinking, your old patterns of behaviour and make some very base-level changes. You are basically being asked to change all that you've known and done your whole life in order to secure healthy coping mechanisms for daily living to lead you to a place of happy living.

Change can be scary and many people aren't quite ready for such immense undertakings. This is perfectly understandable. There is nothing to be ashamed of if you're not quite ready to be at BPDR just yet. We'll still be here for you if or when you are ready to be here and tackle the awesome responsibilities of who we've each become and all the things we say and do.

The Tools promoted at BPDR are CBT-based but they are not exclusionary. You may find one is more effective for you than another. You may find that a slightly different version of a BPDR tool (maybe with a DBT name) works better for you. As long as you are focused on recovery (aka healthy happy living), are willing to work within the premise of the Existential Paradox and can accept BPDR for what it is and offers, you are welcome here no matter what modality of therapy you may embrace offline.

There is more to BPDR than just the discussion forums. You are encouraged to take a look at the full website's offerings, including the FAQs.

As mentioned, there are very few rigid rules and very minimal structure around time-outs. This means that BPDR operates in the grey, without black-and-white "if you do this, then that will happen" on a systemic level. Boundaries and consequences will still be communicated and enforced but there is no Rule Book to point to and/or hide behind or skate around. BPDR relies more heavily on common sense, judgment calls and wisdom of past experiences to guide each other in our peer support, recovery focused journeys.

Please feel free to ask questions as the need arises but remember that you begin here as a welcome individual. The basic internet guidelines still apply: show respect, be courteous, disagree without flaming/attacking, etc. First and foremost, know that you will always receive feedback at BPDR in one form or another!

All visitors are welcome to submit questions via email to ash @ bpdrecovery.com. Please limit your email to 250 words or less; anything longer will not be read due to time contstraints. Due to the volume of inquiries received, we regretfully cannot guarantee a personal, private response but if your query is of a topic which would be beneficial to the masses, it will be published anonymously - along with the response - on the website.

Please click here to read more about what BPDR is all about.

Announcements: BPD Survey
Official Announcements
From the "Middle Path News" newsletter for April 2009 ...

Mount Sinai is currently researching BPD patients' viewpoints of the current diagnostic criteria with the following explanation:

"People living with borderline personality disorder (BPD) have unique information about the symptoms and consequences of the disorder. Researchers are working on a new study looking at these important and under-explored areas. Please help us by completing an anonymous on-line survey about your thoughts on the current Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders' (DSM) criteria for BPD and your thoughts on what should or shouldn't be included in the criteria for BPD in the upcoming 5th edition of DSM (DSM-V) in 2012."

The link to this survey is:  Here  or directly at
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=c17hYHo6_2fhJhr_2fXghCfihA_3d_3d
 
This survey asks in-depth questions about each of the criteria and asks, based on your experience, what corrections or changes you would make.  There have so far been over 200 participants, and more are needed!  The results will not only be published in an article, but will also be considered by the committee currently working on the BPD revision, as the information is being provided to Andrew Skodol, M.D., chair of the DSM-V workgroup for personality disorders, who has made them available to the members of the workgroup.  
 
This is a historic opportunity -- Please contribute your voice!

Posted by Ash on Wednesday, April 01 @ 18:35:41 EDT (128 reads)
(comments? | Announcements | Score: 0)
Announcements: Interesting BPD-related Articles
Official AnnouncementsIn this article, Borderline Personality Disorder: Brain Differences Related to Disruptions in Cooperation in Relationships, the researchers tried to use gaming theory to the loss of trust within relationships as relevant to sufferers of BPD.  I found this interesting because of the application of gaming theory, being the fan of the television show "Numb3rs" that I am. 

In a semi-follow-up article a few months later, Emotion-Regulating Circuit Weakened in Borderline Personality Disorder, researchers were able to observe that the area of the brain in "the fear hub" and an underdeveloped "hub regulator" within BPD patients using functional MRI technology.

Another article, Borderline Personality Disorder Shows Improvements with Intensive Psychotherapy, explores the therapeutic benefits of transference-focused psychotherapy with the goal of reducing symptoms and improving social function. I would have liked to have seen the full results of the study as they indicate that the patients undergoing a year of TFP improved on 10 out of 12 domains studied.

In the Neural Paths for Borderline Personality Disorder article, researchers showed pleasant and disturbing images to volunteers seated in a functional MRI machine to examine brain activity.  I would have liked to have seen some follow-up research for the differences of the neural paths for BPD patients who subsequently completed a treatment plan to see what level of neural changes could be observed.

I don't believe that the findings in the article Pharmacotherapy Not Proven Effective for Borderline Personality Disorder as terribly surprising. These findings do, however, seem to give credence to the camp within the mental health community that BPD is more nurture than nature in that medications are unable to address a nature-causitive agent within patients. 

To further fuel the debate between the "nature vs. nurture" argument about BPD, the MU Researcher Identifies Possible Genetic Causes of Borderline Personality Disorder article implicates chromosome nine as a likely culprit for the manifestation of BPD.  And so the debate rages on ...

Posted by Ash on Tuesday, February 10 @ 16:34:19 EST (257 reads)
(comments? | Announcements | Score: 3)
Personal Stories: I am a little confused, and yes, I have BPD.
Personal StoriesAnonymous writes "I was first diagnosed with BPD twelve years ago, when I was 18. I was in the height of my rebellious years - drinking, drugs, sex, in trouble with the law - all that "good" stuff. At that time, I didn't think too much about this diagnosis - I didn't care for much then. I also had counselors telling me that "it was nothing, the BPD label is what they put on a person when they cant find anything else."

Twelve years later, I found myself in court, fighting to regain custody of my children with my ex. My ex and his lawyer dug up this report that said I had this illness. I went for a second opinion and the new psychiatrist confirmed the BPD diagnosis. He also said that my disorder "was at its peak twelve years ago and subsided over time."
In my case, he also stated that my emotions are quite subdued. I have worked with him once every one-to-two weeks for a year and I have a therapist I see weekly. For the past two years, I have had a broad range of family and community support. I have taken courses in parenting to be the best mother I can be and I feel I have a solid, loving and attentive relationship with my children, ages 8,6 and 1.  I attend these meetings with my professionals on a consistent basis, along with appointments for my children, doctor, dentist, Parent-Teacher Association (PTA) meetings, etc.

So here's my thing – I’m researching BPD on the internet, trying to find success stories and I can’t find one! I have worked very hard to get where I am today and I continue to work hard. (Still, I don’t own a car or a house or have a lot of money). But I consider myself a good, decent, moral person. I love my kids dearly and I feel that I’m a good mom. In fact , I’m told it often by friends and loved ones and the people who know me best. I am a cherished daughter, a loved sister and I should say that my psychiatrist and therapist support me 100% in my custody battle for my kids.

I will also say that my therapist does not fully support this diagnosis but feels comfortable in saying "strong traits of." I cannot be the exception to the rule – there has to be all kinds of fully-functional people out there with BPD. 

[EDITOR’S NOTE: The Personal Stories section and the Forums are filled with success stories.]

I know I am "impulsive," quick to anger” sometimes, "moody" and relationships with boyfriends for the most part have been turbulent, and when I feel love, I feel no one loves more and when I feel hatred, no one hates more then me! But a lot of the talk and research on this disorder is so pessimistic.

I want to believe that even though I have a "disorder," I can raise happy, healthy, confident children. Or am I wrong? Because my children are born to a mother of BPD, that automatically means that they will no doubt be deprived?! I just feel I am so much more than this "illness" and I feel confused at my findings on the internet, how it is all so negative. I understand that there is negativity with any mental health issue. Reading this stuff about how "therapists don’t like working with people who have BPD" and reading the experiences from children of parents with BPD is horrific. It almost makes it sound like "we" are a lost cause and I am NOT a lost cause just because I feel more intensely and more frequently than others.  I realize I am blessed with the amount of support in my life and I probably would not be here writing if I did not have that.
 
Let’s get it out there and say that we are not "bad" people; we can have meaningful lives. I HAVE B.P.D. AND I AM OK! It causes me to sulk sometimes and get temperamental with my kids - what's your excuse?

Thanks for letting me ramble a bit. I just want to get across to people  that it is not the end of the world: work hard - achieve anything!"
Posted by Ash on Wednesday, September 10 @ 21:44:56 EDT (669 reads)
(comments? | Personal Stories | Score: 5)
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Posted by Ash on Monday, July 30 @ 21:29:29 EDT (1119 reads)
(Read More... | Score: 0)



The Disorder
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