BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Recently, I was made of aware from my spouse that I may have BPD. I am in counseling now and have been since January. In my mind, I went to counseling blaming my MIL and SIL for my anger outbursts.
After, reading about the disorder I could relate to all the traits and actually found myself naming a situation where I acted out. So, this morning I sent my counselor an email telling him this could be me.
I am so ashamed, but glad to see that I am not the only one who has acted like this.
At this time my husband and I are living apart. We were planning on getting a divorce and they may or may not happen at this point. Only time will tell if he can live with me anymore.

hi grace! welcome! waves*

i remember the first time i went to counseling. been about 5 yrs now or so but that day i went in saying my H was abusive and i wanted to know how I* could make him stop. since that first time, and my T at the time didnt laugh at me for being so naive and not even at the preschool level of knowledge, i have learned so much and am still learning every day.

i remember the fight she had getting me to see i needed to make changes in my behavior and thought patterns.looking back, wow, i didnt know a thing! now i still feel i know very little, until i look back to see where i was back then.

i wish you all the best in this path. be sure to check out the tools section.

Hello Grace,

I am still new at this board as well and still struggling with all the stuff that I need to figure out, so I know how difficult it is when you first start this journey.
I got the idea about BPD actually when taking classes for chemical dep. counseling and had to use the DSM IV. There I found the explanation for a lot of stuff I was wondering about all my life and it started to make sense to me. I found out that I am not just some kind of weird, wild woman, who never fit in anywhere, and suffered a great deal of pain over so many years. This said, I did not get to see a T for the BPD, no money, no trained people in a reasonable distance and busy dealing with my home situation (long story) and my work environment (another long story). Even though I don't post very often, I read what's new on the board and it does help.

Hopefully you'll find something useful here. Best thing is to know, that you are not alone!!!!!

Hang in there,

Birgit