BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Hey ,

Im Tony , im 22 currently under going physco therapy in service called Complex Needs , its group therapy , 15 people in the room. Ive been looking for somewhere to chat for a while , as the information states below i find it rather hard mixing into forums/chat rooms with people with the same condition as myself.

Well this is more than likely my 17th forum ive been on in the last 3 years , im not a people person , i don't like listening to other peoples problems and i more often than not assume everyone i speak to lies to me , if i get close to someone i like, i put them under tests to see if there worthy of my company , if they fail there removed from my life period. I cant stand attention seekers , people who lie constantly for attention people who have a tendency to prove a point threw self harm.

Well there you have it.

hi welcome here.
Just curious, what drew you to this site?
On this site, we are all working on our own recovery from borderline personality disorder. This site is a platform to help one another, support one another as well as to explore the recovery tools.

It does sound to me like you have a trust problem. Eg:
"I more often than not assume everyone i speak to lies to me".

Perhaps you could try exploring the ten twisted thinking and see if it helps.

Or you could try something like this:
black and white thinking: everyone I speak to lies to me
being dialectical: some people I speak to don't lie to me but some people would lie to me.

anyway, welcome

Well just because i find it hard interacting with people doesn't mean i don't get lonely. Its Sods Law.

From time to time i have to mix with people to get myself sane , if i had no one to talk to about anything i'd go insane.

It was literally around 2am , i was bored , sat here normally and i googled BPD forums/chat , to see what would come up , and this site did , it was the only site not flaunting or trying to be something special , which is what drew me to it , there's a lot of kids going around claiming to have BPD , or diagnosing themselves with mental health problems , thats why im so defensive about self help forums.

Yeah i wrote that on a bad day , never the less , i still think like that , but not as drastic lol

I can relate to a lot of what you said. I find myself to be overly judgmental of people as well. Not sure why I do it.. A lot of people strike me as show offs, attention seekers, or selfish.

Part of me thinks I just resent people who seem happy and can actually enjoy life and be themselves. It's too bad because from what I gather, most people find friends to be wonderful assets. It's hard to make a friend when people become annoying.

I don't feel this way all of the time. I do enjoy being around people, But when it comes down to being close, I shut off. Maybe I just would rather project negative judgments on them than to further the belief that I'm to blame.

Apologies for this not being a very useful post. Just wanted to throw it out there that I understand.

Exactly! I can't stand overly happy people. It makes me uncomfortable.

Pillz, I do the same thing with people. I will test them to see if they can be trusted. And if they can't, I won't ever talk to them.

I'm so with you all on the friend thing. The funny thing is that I didn't even realize I didn't have any good friends until a therapist pointed it out about 2 years ago. I thought it was completely healthy to have friends you only talk to once or twice a year & that's it. He said a lot of my problems stemmed from not having a support system.

So I set out on this mission to make just one good friend, well that was two years ago and I haven't done it yet. I find that I am overly ciritcal of people. I get annoyed with people & their problems and use it as an excuse to not be close to them. Also I'm very private and tend to keep lot's of secrets from my friends so even if we talk it's usually not about anything of substance.

I am really struggling with this now because I do want a good friend. I feel lonely not having anyone I can talk to about my mental health issues. I feel like it's such a hard thing to go through alone.