BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Does anyone else have a problem crying. I am so depressed at times and feel like crying but can't. I might be in a movie theater and watching a sad movie and want to cry, everyone else is crying, but I am just sitting there dry eyed. I brought this up with my t and he said it was probably related to taking ssri but i have had this problem for years--well before taking any meds. Just wondering if anyone else experiences this and what your thoughts are on it.
jmo

There are times when it's almost as if I 'expect' bad things to happen. When I do, I'm not surprised or shocked in any way when life inevitably turns sour, therefore there is no reason for me to cry. It's almost as if I wanted it to happen, as punishment or something, I dunno. It's really difficult to explain for me.

I guess what I'm saying is that for me, it's difficult to cry about something I knew in my heart would happen. I become rather apathetic to the world; thinking I know what will be when in fact much of the time, I was way off base or maybe just it could have gone down differently if only I had remained open to that possibility.

The meds also do seriously affect my ability to cry.....every time I was on any kind of antidepressant, my ability to FEEL completely, to cry.....well, it was always the first to go.

I can cry by myself when I see movies, but not with other people. I never cried in therapy, not ever, in about 14 years total. With me, it's an inability to let go, to feel safe enough to cry with someone else. After a session, I would immediately cry when I got in my car.

Are you inhibited in other ways? I was always shy and self-conscious about bodily functions. I had problems/still do with using public toilets when anyone I know is in the next stall. I'm more likely to cry when I'm with strangers than with someone I know.

I have cried in therapy maybe 3 or 4 times in 7 years, I think when I was going through my divorce or when my actions have affected my kids.
I am a very shy person, always have been, I like people to think that I am totally in control--if I'm crying then I'll look out of control maybe.