BPDRecovery.com: Forums

Hello everyone,
I am a newbie here. Found this forum earlier this week. I've been in search of some online community that addresses some of the issues that I have been dealing with recently. I was really drawn to the positive nature and support that comes from this board. It appears to be a great place and I am happy to have found it.
I have a history of Complex PTSD - which behaviourally & cognitively, to me at least, seems so closely tied to BPD. I have been in and out of Tx since my teens and I'm now in my mid- 40's. What has essentially brought me here is a recent and painful realization that all of the recovery that I thought had taken place in my life has fallen short of my own expectations. For the last couple of months I have been spiraling & my life has flipped-flopped, which has resulted in my returning to therapy and resuming medication. Despite the pain & unsteadiness of my life now, in many ways, I see the work ahead of me as bittersweet, for its really the first time in my life that I come to my life's work/healing, knowing what I am dealing with. In all the years past, I'd never really given any consideration around 'labeling' my experience. I'm finding though that the naming/labeling is serving me well, as the T that I am currently working with has experience in this area and is optimistic around recovery (something that I currently am not as optimistic about).
In any event, socially, I am quite isolated. Although originally from the U.S., I have been living in a small rural community in the Caribbean for the last 16 years (hence part of my high functioning over these years has been in essence controlled by my isolation & limiting the amount of stimulation in my life). Apart from my new T, I have no one with whom to share my deeper feelings and struggles. So, I come to this community in hopes of learning & sharing & to both give and receive support. One of the true gifts that I'm finding already is that I really don't have as much 'explaining' to do as a result of the community here really 'getting it' - what a profound relief! It feels to me to be a gift to have found this community. Thank you all for being here. Although I am currently in a very tender & somewhat unstable place, over time, I do look forward to getting to know you all. Thanks.
In peace & continued healing,
Amharra

Hi Amharra, and Welcome to BPDR!

I'm really glad that you have found us. I do believe this site, along with the tools espoused here, will help you in your recovery journey. I believe it helps to speak with others going through similiar things and gaining insight and hope from them. I also agree with you that a dx of complex PTSD shares many of the same traits as BPD.

I also found the labeling helpful. Just the' knowing what I'm dealing with' aspect gave me hope that there have been strides made to help people like me recover from my maladaptive coping. It sounds good to me that your T is optimistic about your recovery. I have found that simply by believing recovery is possible, it becomes a reality. I do hope that after a bit of working the tools and talking to people here you might come to see recovery as a viable possibility too.

Anyway, I just wanted to say hello and welcome. Have a good look around if you have not already done so and just dive in where you need to or you believe it would be helpful to others!

Hi Amharra and welcome!

I soo remember that feeling of "profound relief" you talk of. I'm glad you have found somewhere you think may be a part of what you need to further your recovery.

Look forward to reading more of your thoughts!

Welcome

Looking forward to getting to know you.

Thank you Harmonium, Sarah, Mbowden and echoeslikehorses for welcoming me.